Simple Steps to Inner Peace - Radical Acceptance and Forgiveness

Sometimes in life, we face painful, unfair, or hard-to-understand situations. We may keep asking, “Why did this happen to me?” or “What if things had been different?” These thoughts often keep us stuck in sadness, anger, or guilt.

Radical acceptance and forgiveness are two powerful tools that can help us feel better from the inside. These ideas come from the field of positive psychology, which focuses on building a happy and meaningful life.

What is Radical Acceptance?

Radical acceptance means learning to accept life as it is , especially the parts we don’t like or cannot change. It does not mean we are okay with everything that happened, but it means we stop fighting with the past.

For example, if someone close to us hurt us, we may keep wishing it never happened. But that doesn’t change the fact that it did. By accepting the truth, we stop making ourselves suffer even more.

Radical acceptance is like saying, “I didn’t want this, but I accept that it happened. Now I want to find peace.”

What is Forgiveness?

Forgiveness means letting go of anger or pain that we hold in our hearts. It is a gift we give to ourselves , not to the person who hurt us.

There are two types of forgiveness:

Forgiving others: This helps us release pain caused by someone else’s actions.

Forgiving ourselves: This means being kind to ourselves for mistakes we made in the past.

When we forgive, we don’t forget what happened or say that it was okay. We simply stop carrying the weight of it. We choose peace over pain.

How They Work Together

Radical acceptance and forgiveness often go hand in hand. Before we can forgive, we need to accept what happened. Once we stop denying or fighting with reality, it becomes easier to let go and move forward.

These tools help us heal. They remind us that we are not our pain—we are more than what happened to us.

How Can This Help in Daily Life?

In relationships: Acceptance helps us see people as they are. Forgiveness helps repair connection when there has been hurt.

In our own journey: Many people carry guilt, regret, or anger for years. Letting go brings lightness and strength.

In small daily struggles: We may feel upset by small things—disagreements, disappointments, or unfair events. These tools help us feel calmer and stronger in such moments.

Try This Simple Practice

1. Think about a situation that still hurts.

2. Say to yourself: “This happened. I can’t change it, but I can choose how I feel about it now.”

3. Breathe slowly and deeply.

4. Say: “I choose to let go of this pain. I want to feel free.”

5. Repeat as needed. Healing takes time, and that’s okay.

In Conclusion

Radical acceptance and forgiveness are gentle but strong steps toward peace. They help us stop fighting with the past and start living more fully in the present. You don’t have to forget what happened, but you can stop letting it control your thoughts and emotions.

When we accept, we soften.

When we forgive, we heal.

Published by MindLeo Counselling and Retreat Centre

Consultant Psychologist: Shilphy Francis